Monday, October 6, 2014

#Write31Days - Oct 6 - Real Talk

In my Entrepreneur class at school we talk about all sorts of businesses and what makes them appealing, why do we choose to spend money there and what does the business sell besides a product, ultimately influencing customers to return again and again.

We always get to coffee shops and I have several students developing a coffee shop as their created business. What is it about a coffee shop that makes us pay a little more for caffeine and want to go back there again and again?

They aren't just selling coffee. They also sell a place to connect.  Where they want people to hang out, have conversation, do business.  I have met people for interviews at coffee shops, hung out with friends countless times, worked on business deals and also soaked up some me time all over a latte of some flavor and in the name of checking out for a bit to check in to quality time.  My very favorite is weekend breakfast with a couple of cups of coffee, no rush to be anywhere, the only priority being the person I am spending time with.

I saw a recent Starbucks commercial, it's worth viewing out if you haven't seen it...it's only 30 seconds...Starbucks Apology.

Something gets lost in translation when all we do is text.  At some point you need to connect, face to face with all the people in your life.  Otherwise "conversations" fall into this pattern...

How are you? 
-Good

How was your day?
- Good

What's up?
-Nothing

What are you up to?
-Nothing

It's so easy to just respond with "good" or "ok" or "nothing" or "busy" and move along.  To continuously do this eventually kills a relationship.  There is no real connection. 

Real conversation shows facial expression, digs deeper and challenges one another.  Even when it's hard, better to have a real conversation than escape behind a quick text or a one word, ultimately avoidance, answer.

But, we're all good at this. 

So make it a point.  Don't just be a texter.   Connect with real people in real life.  Ask real questions.  Don't just ask how was your day.  Know details and ask about a specific part of a day.  Allow yourself to be vulnerable and let others in.  It's hard, but the more we do it, the better we will become.

Challenge yourself to put away your phone during real conversations.  Over breakfast, dinner, over coffee, or some other place that you are.  Focus on the person you are with.  None of us are that busy that we can't disconnect for a little bit and connect for a better relationship, no matter the context - friend, family, spouse, significant other, co-worker.  They all deserve more than just a text message. 


See you for coffee,

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